Friends Eh?

Well for starters, this post was not triggered by any specific incident. Just a lot of things have been happening and I make observations and store them away in the back of my mind for later use. I am one of those people that is overly nice to everyone and I have a lot of "friends" and consequently I get walked all over a lot. The thing is that I don't want to change the way I am because every once in a while someone can come along and surprise me. There really are genuine people in this world, its just that they are hard to find.

I am finding more and more people out there seem to feel that they need to lie. I am not sure why because I am very open-minded and I accept people for who they are. If you don't have the greatest life in the world then change that. Don't just lie about it so people think you are so amazing. What you don't realize is that we can see right through you.

Myself, when I meet people I genuinely want to get to know them. I am fascinated by all the different things that people do in their lives, both the good and the bad. I think that everything that happens to us helps to shape us and make us who we are. Without these influences, we would be nothing. Hardships and difficulties either make us strong or beat us down and that all depends on how we manage our feelings. Some people are easily influenced by others and that can be a good thing if others are looking out for their best interests. If not, it can be very destructive and lead to a miserable life.

You may have heard that everything in the universe happens the way it is supposed to happen. I believe that very strongly. So many things in life don't seem to make sense at the time and then later on we realize that we are better off because of it. Maybe leading a healthy and happy life is simply a matter of embracing that fact and moving on. I know this has worked for me very well, and I try my best to not get hung up on a specific incident or person or event because I know things will go on as they should.

Back to the friend thing... I think most people can count on one hand how many true friendships they have in their life. These are the people that are there for you when you need them. They are not what I call "fair weather friends". The majority of friends are there when there is something in it for them, or when they are bored and have nothing better to do. Or worse, you happen to be influential in some way and they gain by being around you.

Anyways, this is sounding a little depressing, but that was not my intention. What I mean to say is that you need to keep your eyes open so that you can tell the difference between a fair weather friend and a true friend. The reason is that it is the true friends that you need to make sure you are a true friend back with.

I once told someone that they should take a look at every person in their life and ask themselves if that person adds value, or sucks life out of them. If they add value then great, but if they don't add value then get rid of them. One of the simplest keys to happiness is surrounding yourself with good people that make you happy. If you are spending energy on someone who does not make you happy then you need to be a little bit selfish and let them go. You need to realize that life is short and there is no point wasting precious moments with people that don't deserve your energy. Let them go out and find someone else who they can relate to and maybe they will realize what a true friend should be.

This Life They See

I have not been in a good place lately. I hope to come out of it soon, but I am having a very hard time with everything right now. I wrote this "thing" to try and express my feelings. I don't know if it is a poem or whatever but who cares, it is what it is...

the thoughts were easy
the path always clear
always knowing
never any fear

things happen as they should
goals achieved one after the next
life seems so easy
live with no regrets

how could this happen?
how did I get here?
with no one to talk to
all full of fear

have I been asleep?
or living some other life?
i feel so alone
so helpless and lost

you don't know about a perfect life
it's what you think you want
then realize the knife
nowhere to go

someone has to suffer
does it always have to be me?
thoughts are so dark
feelings so cold

who would understand?
who really cares?

with life there are choices
some easy and some hard
there are people you love
and others that love you

they are not always the same
one of life's little tricks
to beat you down hard
to test your strength
and harden your heart

no one is immune
it's your choice indeed
to let life break you
or to hold strong and need
to conquer your mind
and overcome your fears

it's okay to be alone
sometimes in tears
for you are only human
and it comes down to this
even knowing what you want
is rarely what you need

others think its perfect
this life they see

if only they could know you
how your heart makes you suffer
it's something not seen

you put on a smile
and make them believe
its a perfect life
this life they see

It's About Bloody Time Al

Well hey there people, I would apologize for not writing in my blog for so long, however stats say that no one ever reads this blog anyway. That's ok, I really don't care. So what the heck has happened since I last wrote? Well, a heck of a lot... I have taken my photography to a higher level and I am having so much fun with it. I have now specialized on Fine Art Nude photography and I think that I have some talent there. So many beautiful women want to work with me and I am so happy with how the photos are turning out. If anyone does read this and wants to check out my work, you can go to Aduro Photography Fine Art Nude Gallery and have a look. The images are in chronological order so if you want to see the newest stuff, go to the last page.

I have also been working pretty regularly on a podcast. It is for Photographers, Makeup Artists, and Models and it is called "I Am Aduro". You can check it out at http://podcast.aduro.ca. We just recorded episode 51 on Friday evening and every episode has turned out to be very informative and interesting. The feedback has been very positive so I have been very motivated to keep going. My co-host and the producer of the show is my photographer friend, Andrew Bolton. I think we are a good team.

Look forward to lots of exciting new things from me in the near future. I hope that I am not too busy so that I can blog about it regularly.

Cheers,
Al

For The Future - Life's Answers Contained In a Science Fiction TV Series.

I just love science fiction. One of my all time favorite series is Babylon 5 created by J. Michael Straczynski. I remember way back in 1994 when the show first aired. My soon-to-be wife and I began watching and although the sets and some of the acting were a little "low budget", the computer generated special effects were way ahead of their time. I remember thinking YES! finally a science fiction show that had realistic flight characteristics in the space ships. Something that always really bothered me about Star Wars and Star Trek. Except for some of the more advanced races of aliens, the humans even needed to have rotating sections of their ships and space stations to maintain artificial gravity. Now I am not physicist, but it was way more believable that most of the other stuff I had seen in the past. At least Straczynski gave it some thought. Oh and the design of the Star Fury fighter craft was outstanding. I have a scale model that I built a long time ago and it still sits in my office. One of "MY THINGS" that the kids are not allowed to touch. Much later in the the fourth season of the show they introduced the "White Star" ships that were built by the Mimbari with some Vorlon technology. By far the coolest ships out of any science fiction show ever.

Anyways, this post is not about space ships. It is about the show in general that had such an intricate story line and characters that fans who watched every episode felt like they were a part of it. As you watched each episode, you could see a mirror into reality. The show dealt with religion, poverty, corruption, racism, death, love, and compassion. It showed how love and friendship can stand over anything that challenged it. It made you realize that humans squabble and fight over the most petty little things. How literally stupid we must look to an outsider when we complain and cry about the things that don't really matter. How precious life really is and how short it can be. In the second last episode of the final season of the show, President John Sheridan wakes up in the middle of the night thinking about his own mortality. He decides to record a message to his un-born son to be played back to him on his 21st birthday. If you had seen the series you would know that John Sheridan only had 19 more years to live, so he would never see his son's 21st birthday.

This speech moved me to tears and it touches so many points about life and the way things are and the way things need to be. I don't know for sure if Straczynski wrote this himself, or if it was another writer, but one day I would love to find out and shake the hand of that person. By the way, Sheridan's wife's name is Delenn.

Londo's visit got me thinking about the day my child comes of age. On Earth, that's 21. If Lorien's prediction holds, I only have 19 years left. I won't be there to see you come into your own. Whoever you are, Whoever you will be. Not that either of those things matter. Because site unseen, I know that I will love you because you are my child, and the child of the woman I love more than life itself. I will give you that love, as best I can, for as long as I'm here. But a day like this, your 21st birthday, requires something more. So, I give you what little wisdom I have.

Delenn is the greatest ally you will ever have. Her depths of courage and compassion are unmatched in my experience. Look to her for wisdom and fire in equal measure, and if you ever have any doubt, talk to her. She will never judge you, she will only love you. From time to time, you will make mistakes, there inevitable. Sometimes those mistakes will be huge. What matters is that you learn from them. There's nothing wrong with falling down as long as you end up just two inches taller when you pick yourself up off the floor. At times you may end up far away from home. You may not be sure of where you belong anymore, but home is always there. Because home is not a place, its wherever your passion takes you. As you continue on your path, you will lose some friends and gain new ones. The process is painful, but often necessary. They will change, and you will change because life is change. From time to time they must find their own way and that way may not be yours. Enjoy them for what they are, and remember them for what they were. There's not much left, except I believe, I really do believe that sooner or later no matter what happens, things do work out. We have hard times, we suffer, we lose loved ones, the road is never easy. It was never meant to be easy, but in the long run if you stay true to what you believe, things do work out. Always be willing to fight for what you believe in. It doesn't matter if a thousand people agree with you, or one person agrees with you. It doesn't matter if you stand completely alone. Fight for what you believe. Which brings me to the first piece of advice my dad ever gave me and now I am giving it to you.

Never start a fight, but always finish it.

My wife and I have two boys, one is 6 and the other is 7. I own a box set of the Babylon 5 series and one evening I decided that we should watch it with the kids. We started, and nearly every night we watched at least one episode. My kids really got into the show and it was wonderful family time for us that I looked forward to every night. Earlier tonight we watched the final two episodes and that is why I am creating this post. I am still moved by the show and my kids want to watch some of the spin-off series including Crusades that I also have on DVD. As well there are some two-hour made-for-tv movies that Straczynski made throughout the 5 years of the show. If you ever have the opportunity to pick up the full five seasons of Babylon 5 (they have them at Costco now) make sure you do it. Watch them with your family from beginning to end. This is a very intricate story that must be seen. So many good morals and life lessons to be learned.

There are a lot of amazing stories that have been created in the world, but I think you will find that Babylon 5 was right up there as one of the best.

That was a short chapter

It has been almost a week now since I got lay'd off. The first job I have ever lost in my entire life. It was very quick and clean, the way things should be. I didn't screw up or anything, they just decided that we were going down a different road than they intended when they hired me. Besides, I was expensive and they needed to keep things tight and lean. Although I was taken by surprise, it barely phased me. I was not happy there anyways.

The truth is that I am an entrepreneur at heart and working for someone else is just not my thing. This is the universe telling me to give my head a shake and stop expecting someone else to look after me. After all, I have been looking after myself for most of my life and I just need to get off my ass and grab the bull by the horns and whatever other metaphor you can think of for getting it done myself.

With that short chapter closed now, I find myself realizing where I belong and what I need to do. I am much happier now than I have been in a very long time. I am back at the helm of my own destiny and each decision I make and every path I take is up to me. The way it should be.

I currently have numerous exciting things on the go. I have a successful photography business, not to mention my "day job" as President & CEO of a software company. On top of that I have a podcast with a significant and quickly growing fan base and I am about to start another podcast very soon. I have a wonderful family with two amazing kids, and so many incredible friends that I adore.

Yup, sometimes you just need a kick in the ass to open up your eyes and see what is right in front of you. My advice to anyone reading this is to listen carefully to these words by Joseph Campbel. He once said "Follow your bliss, and invisible hands will guide you." Words to live by for sure.